CunnilingusI find giving cunnilingus and bringing a lady to an extended 'warm glow' orgasm is probably the most pleasurable thing in _my_ life. Since I get so much pleasure from it, I've personally tried to learn as much as possible about what makes it supremely satisfying for her.
Keeps me busy. ;o)
As cunnilingus is my only sexual outlet, I've had a fair amount of practice with it. I've found that in my experience no two women respond alike.
I generally start out with a lot of gentle touching and caressing of her entire body, with particular attention to any areas where she obviously responds with pleasure.
I also find out then if she is a woman who prefers a 'stronger' touch, and will attempt to accomodate her.
I take the same gentle approach with cunnilingus, and try to be VERY sensitive to signals from her body - changes in muscle tensions, movements, small sounds, etc.
In my experience that is a much more pleasant experience for her than someone who makes a direct frontal assault in her clit, and is too rough.
Usually with the softer approach, and not concentrating on one area, the pleasure can slowly build, and the eventual release is more extended and pleasurable. (There's aways the one who seems to think that a pair of Vise-Grips is gentle enough, of course - one just has to accomodate her needs and desires as best one can.)
Remember also to pay attention to the labia. Don't just concentrate on her clitoris, but spend some time wandering your tongue over the whole area. When things seem to be getting a bit too intense for her with attention to her clit, back off and let her enjoy the building sensations - move around a bit. When her muscle tension goes down a bit, gently move back to her clit and see what happens.
If you're paying close attention you'll be able to tell when she just HAS to climax. Let her, but don't OVER stimulate at that point. Pleasure can turn into pain if you keep going beyond the point she can endure.
Of those women I've known the majority also seem to like a bit of play, as she's approaching climax, with her 'G-Spot.' I find it easiest to gently insert my middle finger, palm up, into her vagina and gently (always gently) massaging the upper inside surface. You'll generally know when you get there. :o)
Before we even get into bed, however, I like to have a quiet talk about what she thinks she likes, and even more importantly what she definately DOES NOT like. If she's relatively inexperienced, one can't get too much reliable information that way, so I try to convince her that it's really OK to talk about what she's feeling and what she likes/dislikes while it's happening. (Actually, if the woman doesn't mind offering a bit of guidance during, I greatly appreciate it...and so will she...)
Most importantly, though, I think that paying very close attention to her responses, and not having any pre-concieved notions about what 'all' women might like ('cause it just isn't true) is the most important part (that and learning to breath through one's ears for long periods while one's head is being crushed, of course).
I've had the good fortune to have changed the mind of more than one woman who didn't think she liked cunnilingus. It's all in being sensitive to her signals and needs. What I've usually found is that their prior lovers did not take their time, or were too rough.
Keep in mind, also, that pleasure can turn into distress if one continues much after she's already peaked.
Give her a break and let things calm down for a bit - then VERY gently start again but be ready to stop instantly if it doesn't bring her pleasure.
Oh! One final thought - don't plan on it being quick... if you take less than an hour you rushed things.
While you're doing this SHE is the most important thing in the world, you're not doing anything else, and you have no place you need to go. Take your time and concentrate only on her.
Yes, it CAN be quick, but slower is better for most women I've known.
I do hope the ladies make some serious comments to this thread 'cause I'd always like to learn more.Tom
smooth@null.net
